Ines Geipel – Umkämpfte Zone

Sehr interessantes, absolut lesenswertes Buch.

Ines Geipel erzählt hier 3 Geschichten parallel, episodenhaft über ihr Verhältniss zu ihrem Bruder, über ihre Familiengeschichte, und über die DDR bzw. den Osten nach der Wende. Und das ganze relativ zusammenhanglos, aber immer schön chronologisch.

Über die ersten beiden Themen will ich mich gar nicht auslassen, aber der Inhalt ist auf alle Fälle heftig und sie schreibt das auch sehr schonungslos, konfrontativ. Ich mag das. Generell ist der Duktus des Buches eher wütend, aufwühlerisch gehalten, ganz weit weg von der Melancholie einer Annie Ernaux. Und das ganze auch noch in einer poetischen, aber sehr rauen Sprache.

Über die DDR und später die neuen Bundesländer versucht sie nicht geringeres als eine Psychoanalyse vorzunehmen und das gelingt ihr hervorragend, da gehts um Themen wie Verdrängung, Aufarbeitung, Schuld, Angst. Problematisch wird es aber am Ende, da man vielleicht einen Menschen nach gründlicher Analyse von seien Problemen therapieren kann, aber wie soll das mit einem Volk geschehen? Sie bleibt in ihren Lösungsansätzen (also zB wie man mit dem erstarkenden Nationalismus umgehen soll) sehr vage, das geht leider nicht weit über „man muss es an den Küchentisch bringen“ hinaus. Aber ganz ehrlich, ich glaube da auch nicht daß es eine Lösung per Fingerschnipp geben kann, bzw. ist mir jeder der das behauptet bisschen suspekt.

Sehr intensives Buch über die Geschichte der DDR und den Osten – absolute Leseempfehlung.

Arthur Schnitzler – Traumnovelle

Nach Stefan Zweigs Schachnovelle hab ich noch dieses kleine Büchlein im Schrank gefunden. Ebenfalls eine Novelle, sogar mit Namen im Titel, ist es zwar thematisch gesehen ein anderes Werk aber von der Form her ebenso wie Zweigs Werk eine etwas längere, abgeschlossene Kurzgeschichte die sich um ein, zwei Themen zentriert.

Waren das bei Zweig die Auswirkung der Isolationshaft und die Ggenüberstellung von 2 charakterlich verschiedenen Schachspielern, ist es bei Schnitzler die Erzählung von einem Ehepaar und einem Ausbruchsversuchs des Mannes aus dieser für ihn langweilig gewordenen Beziehung. Er flüchtet sich dabei innerhalb einer Nacht in mehrere erotisch angehauchte Situation, von harmlos bis hin zu (wie sich später herausstellt) hochgefährlich. Als er wieder nach Hause kommt erzählt ihm seine frau von einem Traum in der sie ihn im Stich gelassen hat und damit ist seine Entscheidung klar: er will das abenteurliche Nachtleben fortsetzen und Frau und Kind sollen sehen wo sie bleiben. Wie das ausgeht verate ich nicht, aber das Ende macht diese Novelle zu einer herausragenden Liebesgeschichte.

Schnitzler hat einen Ruf als psychologischer Schreiber, es dreht sich viel um Gefühle, Ängste, Begierden. In diesem Fall tut das dem Lesefluss und der Spannung keinen Abruch, es sorgt dafür, daß die Figuren in kürzester Zeit auch Tiefe gewinnen.

Absolut lesenswert.

Reversing forced right-handedness III – Experience

Being one month into this now, let me tell you some experiences.

It is amazing how mundane tasks work better with the left hand, be it lighting a match, opening a lock, using cutlery, stick to the rhythm of music or using the left foot as the tact-giver or holding or using something; its amazing. The left is my stronger side, I´m pretty much aware of this now, one month after switching.

The first weeks it felt quite awkward because procedurally and intuitively I´m used to do anything with the right and I had to force myself to do stuff with my left. But now it almost feels natural and everything small and simple works equal or better with the left, I also intuitively use my left in the first place. Writing still is a big problem, it will take me months if not years to switch it and these days I´m not a hundred percent convinced if it will ever happen. This is the biggest task but I´m willing to test myself. What also does not work pretty well is gaming on the computer, it´s too deeply wired. But my gaming career which lasted for more than 20 years now is coming to and end anyways or at least I´m reducing it to a much lower level, don´t have the time these days.

It´s pretty much clear now, I´m a left-hander. This is definitely one of the most important conclusions and experiences I´ve ever had and if only for this moment of clarity it has already been worth considering myself with this stuff. Feels good.

Reversing forced right-handedness II – Science

Before we start: I will not use footnotes or state my sources on every corner, this is not a scientific thesis in the end. Some of the science is not fully researched or there is very little data I have access to, especially when it comes to the topic of forced right-handedness (there is no to little science available on this). Also, the topic of laterality is not a quite common one especially when it comes to influence of handedness on individual characteristics of a person, there are only hints and signs as I´d call it. I have some of it ready though, so if you want to know and do some digging on your own or if you want to test me please do so, I´m always happy to share knowledge, am grateful for confrontation or up for some scientific fighting.

And a last one. I´ll mark important sentences with – at the beginning and end.

Ok? Then lets get this thing on the road.

Construction of the human brain

The stuff that comes now is scientifically backed knowledge, you can start on Wikipedia under ‘brain laterality’ and click through. It´s actually quite interesting how this knowledge was gained, go check it out.

The human brain consists of two hemispheres, a left and a right one (I´ll abbreviate them as LH and RH from now on) which are connected via the corpus callosum, strings of nerve fibers. – The hemispheres are organized counterlateral meaning that stimuli on one side of the body are processed by the opposite hemisphere and that impulses to the muscles are sent from the opposite hemisphere – , this also applies to eyes ans ears (although this is a bit more complicated to explain). Besides these physiological functions the two hemispheres have different specializations and areas of responsibility which cover all tasks that the brain performs: reception, processing, reaction and retrieving stored knowledge. The corpus callosum integrates sensoric inputs and outputs into coherent perception and behavior.

– The most fundamental difference between the two hemispheres is that the LH houses the analytical, logical thinking and works linear, meaning one step after the other, whereas the RH prefers synthetic, integral, holistic thinking which is simultaneous and rich in associations. – From these two very different ways of processing specific functions of each hemisphere can be derived. Apart from that the LH tends towards an optimistic view of the world and vice versa (You also wonder how they find that out? Go exploring and start with “Deglin”, “Geschwind” or “Norman” and “brain damage”).

The centre of speech is normally located in the LH. Practice and science shows that the ability to use speech verbally as a reliable tool is responsible for the development of certain characteristics of a person especially concerning social interactions. To anticipate a bit, this becomes important later because a left-hander who is forced to be a right-hander overuses his LH and the centre of speech can be impeded in its development.

To get a bit closer to the topic, in each person there is a dominant hemisphere and this defines whether you are a right-hander or a left-hander. More precisely, this also (but not with a 100% certainty) extends to feet, eyes and ears, so the correct term would be left- or right-sider, but I´ll stick to -hander. This is an either-or, there is no such thing as a born mixed-hander or born ambidextrous person, people who consider themselves as such are most likely forced right-handers. But I´m not saying that true ambidexterity can´t be achieved, meaning that you can do things with either hand in the same quality as with your strong hand, through training it can be possible, but honestly, whats the point, except for some very special situation and you have to tell me one because I can´t think of any.

Time for a statement, but don´t throw anything at your screen now, keep calm.

Statement: Ambidexterity is not an advantage, it is a handicap, in some cases even a very vicious one because ambidexters think that this puts them above others but in the end they are part of a very sad story.

We are all born with a clear preference for one side of our body and you can do things more precise, more forceful, faster and with lower reaction time with this side only. Time you spend for training the weaker one could have been used for other things and whats much worse than that is that your brain is overused and this WILL impede other functions.

I know that if you consider yourself ambidextrous this is tough to swallow and you may scold me for it but believe me, I´m not talking bullshit here. I´d consider myself ambidextrous to some degree but its all mundane tasks and pretty much worth- or senseless in normal life. But I can cope with this perfectly, it´s all fate and in the past, bla bla.

Next time I´ll talk about domination.

Reversing forced right-handedness I – Introduction

A topic came up in my mind during the last months and during the last days I found that I have to delve deeper into it – I´m a left-hander being trained from youth on to use make the right hand the dominating one. And I found that this may explain some of my characteristics, some good ones and some bad ones and what I want to do now is to reverse this process, meaning training my left hand to complete task which I would normally do with my right hand.

My motivation is to test what effect this will have on me, I´ll basically do this for the experience and because I think it will have a positive effect, not in the sense that I´ll become a better person but that I can be in better accordance with my own, to better understand myself.

I´ve know that I´m a left-hander since my childhood, it´s something which has been clear to me my whole life but so far I didn´t pay much attention to it. I write with my right hand (and have a terrible handwriting), I clean dishes with my right, use cutlery like a right-hander, use the mouse on the right side, I use right-hander stuff, it´s normal for me to use my right hands for almost all tasks. But I play table-tennis or badminton with my left and I´m left-footed and this shows that originally my left side is my dominant one, the stuff I do with my right was trained (or I would even say ‘forced’, but this is too harsh since it was not done on purpose as I´ll explain in a second.) on me as a child. But before you think this goes in the wrong direction I want to make a statement here:

Point 1: I don´t blame anybody, not my parents, not the society, not my teachers, nobody. Things were as they were and are now as they are, there´s no point in looking back and feel grief or hate.

Life consists of events which are influenced by fate and one´s decisions. And what I´ve learned this year is that fate can be provoked by doing lots of stuff, take a risk once in a while, to make events happen. Sure, I´ll fall sometimes, make mistakes and feel bad about things once in while, but this is better than doing nothing, taking the easy road and just letting time pass. You only life once, there is no such thing as a second chance. Enough kitchen philosophy for now, back to the task.

So what I´ll do the next days and weeks is using my left hand for mundane tasks, practice writing with my left but also read deeper into the topic and let you know about the results.

If you are interested into the topic rummage in the net for “forced dextrality” “forced right-handedness” or similar and let me know, I´m interested in knowing more.

If you find yourself in the same situation and want to try this too I have a word of advice though: Having read a bit into the topic, trying to switch back to the left hand may not be without risk and there are warning signs from psychologists that this should not be done without professional aid since it is an intrusion into the brain structure and can have severe consequences.

Now I´m not afraid of messing with my brain – I have done this my whole life – and am doing this without any help, because I know myself best and can evaluate things on my own. But maybe you shouldn´t do this on your own – just saying.